Bowl Preview: Sheraton Hawaii Bowl

Sheraton Hawaii Bowl
Aloha Stadium, Honolulu
Nevada vs. Southern Methodist University
Date: Dec. 24
Time: 8 p.m.
TV: ESPN (no kidding?)
Line: Nevada -12.5

About Nevada (8-4): The Wolfpack were a team that was expected to challenge Boise State in the WAC, mostly because of their dynamic "Pistol" offense. No such luck. While they were busy drawing up plays for the Pistol, they probably should have been working on tackling drills because their defense is horrific. Do you want to know why people, such as myself, think Boise and the WAC are still a joke? Nevada, out of conference schedule vs. Notre Dame, Missouri, UNLV and Colorado State - 1-3. Nevada in the WAC - 7-1.

Intangibles:
Bonanza Casino: +3 (you must go. It's exactly what you think.)
Rest of Reno: -2
Tahoe: +2

About SMU: The Mustangs are back in a bowl game for the first time since receiving the NCAA's death penalty in 1987. The death penalty was so effective that no other school has cheated since. That can be the only reason nobody has gotten the death penalty. It's certainly not because the NCAA is scared to death of hurting the ginormous cash cow of college football. Uh, anyway, so SMU has a team and June Jones is the coach. That ends the extent of my knowledge about SMU.

Intangibles:
Eric Dickerson: +4
Craig James: +1
Craig James as announcer: -5 (stop f'ing giggling, you idiot)

Impact Player: Nevada QB Colin Pumpernickle, err, Colin Copernicus, err something like that. He's very tall and skinny. And you'd think he'd be better. But he's not. Still, it's SMU. How good does he have to be?

Bowl Slogan: "Another indigenous people conquered. But we're not bitter. And we're certainly not spitting in your drinks, you white bastards."

Little Known Fact: Notre Dame played in this game last year, kicked the crap out of Hawaii and became convinced 2009 would be a return to glory. That was beautiful.

Watchability (1-5): .4

The pick: Nevada 41, SMU 28