Let the cheating begin

According to a report on ESPN.com, former Auburn football coach Terry Bowden will return to the sidelines in 2009 at Division II North Alabama.

You thought Terry cheated at Auburn. Think what he'll do at a D-2 school. He'll take all those sneaky, back-handed lessons he learned from his papa and elevate his cheating to a whole new scale.

He won't be at North Alabama long enough to face the NCAA probe and future punishment. This is just an audition for Terry, who hopes to land a bigger, more profile D-1 job. He hopes to get the West Virginia gig if Bill Stewart steps down or is forced out. But don't count on that one (unless Gov. Manchin steps in again).

Bowden, 52, has an impressive resume. He arrives in Florence, Ala., with a 111-53-2 record. He should do well at North Alabama. The Lions went 12-2 last season and advanced to the semifinals of the D-2 playoffs.

With a few "minor" violations, Bowden can certainly get them to the title game.

Dr. Lou sath ETHPN ith hiring

Someday, if things go right, I'll be able to quit my job in the middle of the busiest time of the year and collect a $3.5 million severance.


Bowden was 72-45 at Clemson and 42-32 in ACC play. Which, let's face it, ain't exactly like playing the Steel Curtain week in, week out.

Of course, Clemson players were distraught with the decision and demanded Bowden return. Or, umm, maybe not.

Quarterback Cullen Harper, who had just been told he was getting demoted, was ready to pounce on Bowden's barely rotting corpse.

"I'd call it karma," he said. "I thought it needed to be done. I think anytime a head coach or someone in a leadership position starts to place blame on his coaches and players, it weakens their respect on the team. His past experiences have shown he's done that."

Awesome. Three Bowdens down (i'm assuming Jeff is working at a car wash somewhere), one very old one to go.

Bowden's teams were notoriously neurotic. It peaked this year with a No. 9 preseason ranking and lots of big talk, only to get smacked by Bama in the opener. Typical. Some weeks Bowden's teams look they invented the game. Other weeks, it looked as if they'd never seen a football.

Now, talk turns to who is next for the Tigers. Lane Kiffin's name is already coming up as is Texas defensive coordinator Will Muschamp. Other big, pie-in-the-sky, your-school-just-isn't-that-big-of-a-deal names include Butch Davis and Rich Rodriguez.

Whoever takes the job should be very, very wary. Clemson is fool's gold. They've got a fan base who thinks quite a bit more of this school's potential than history would agree with. That's a dangerous combination.

I hear Danny Ford's available.